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So it's OK for a genius to take out the whip? To each his own I guess. But think about this ... along with the transmission of genius come demons as well. Choose wisely.

There isn't a human being on this planet that I will willingly take abuse from, no matter how talented, and I've felt that way ever since I got old enough to fight back.

For instance, I think any man or woman, no matter how talented, no matter how much a genius, deserves to be humiliated for acting like a spoiled child, not rewarded.

Then genius who takes out a whip deserves to receive a whipping.

You take the rough with the smooth. Or as my mum says, take it from whence it came.

There is a difference between a teacher who is abusive for the heck of it and a teacher who is a hard task master with high expectations. Not all teacher's who make students cry are abusive. Sometimes a student absolutely should cry because they just have not put the work in and need to understand that it's not acceptable.

Someone asked why these seemingly abusive teachers have so much success. I would say it's obvious. Fear can be a great motivating factor. I bet their students would not dare turn up to a lesson unprepared.

I had a very hard teacher at college. He was not abusive although he was prone to a bit of swearing now and then. He just wouldn't take any s**t. Most of his students ended up transferring to the 'easy' teacher on the staff. Their grades went down! I talked to him about this once (when he was in a good mood). He said, "What are good results compared to an easy ride?". I was the only student who stuck him out for the full course. My final exam was great and I got the best grades in the whole department. The best complement he ever gave me was, "You are okay, you can play". That was a one off. Most of the time he was telling me to **** off and come back when I could play the notes.

I do think it can be a fine line. Look at hippido for example. Here we have a 6 year old boy playing intermediate pieces. There is no doubt the lad is doing well. So his teacher can be tough. Is that really so bad? I would think twice before switching to someone else.

I agree with Chris H.

My piano teacher at college is very tough an dintimidating. You can tell that she doesn't mess around just by walking in there; she doesn't even have to say anything. She has never raised her voice, but anytime she says anything negative I feel horrible. I would never dare go in there without having practiced sufficiently.

It took me a while to understand her. The first semester I was in the music school, I thought I was doing horribly because she never complimented me, and always found things to improve. I thought all the other piano majors were better than me. Then I told her I considered transferring out of music, and she told me how she really felt. She said I was one of her most talented students, etc. Now when I heard that, of course it meant absolutely the world since I respected her very much, and since she had never said anything that nice before.

It is stressful, especially when I don't practice enough, but I'm progressing incredibly quickly under her than any other teacher I've had in the past, so I really am grateful for that.

I remember the day I was glad I did practice though. I was in a piano ensemble, made up of 10 people, 4 of them playing the piano at a time. She once took music from someone and gave it to someone else, saying it was difficult and they'd be able to handle it better. Another time, she told someone if they came the next week without having practiced, she would send them home.

But when I told her I was having a lot of trouble affording the music school, she went out of her way to try to get me a grant, writing a letter of recommendation and everything, all of which was her idea. I was really grateful for that.

I really like my teacher at home, who is very personable and I can actually talk to. But she's not nearly as good as my teacher at college.

That's the first thing right there - intent and purpose. In fact, a teacher who cruises through the pages of a book without teaching much, gives a student simplified music requiring no effort, does no correction, is practising neglect which can be considered a form of abuse too. One remains unskilled and unable to handle difficulties in music, while probably believing in a personal lack of ability. That leads to a kind of helplesness. I don't know if a teacher has to be "mean", though.

The abusive teacher is the one who does not care foremost about the student's progress, but is on a power trip, or likes to feel superior by making the student feel small. Or is hiding inadequacies. What about the tales of teachers who cannot make a concept clear, and when the student struggles, rants and raves, i.e. has a temper tantrum? Others will denigrate not only their student, but every other teacher and maybe most performers, which will make themselves appear superior - that cannot be for the sake of the student. That's on the abuse side, imho.



I would first want to know whether this child is also being taught how to play the piano, rather than just being given difficult pieces. In another thread the parent was trying to figure out what tempo it should be --- which made me wonder why the teacher had not provided that. Additionally the practising instructions consisted of "play it through every day for an hour about 25 times." Is the child also being taught how to play the piano and how to approach a piece? When a bunch of little kids play advanced pieces in a recital, that makes the teacher look good and the audience is impressed with the teacher. If what has gone into the preparation of those pieces is to the benefit of the student, then I imagine it is a good thing. Can such a thing be to the detriment of a student in other cases?

As someone who had a teacher for guitar a VERY long time ago, I came away with a bad taste for all teachers, and in reading about experiences, I've decided the only teachers I need are myself, and the internet forums.

Most teachers I've come across want to teach their way, and any questions about the method are frowned upon, and you are then told why you will never be a good player.

I also keep hearing about a certain age being too late to start, and I think that's BS, you're never too old to start playing, if you enjoy music, only good can come of playing no matter what age.

Why would you think she's a "good teacher"? Lots of folks "know a lot" but that doesn't mean they are good teachers. Just asking...
If you were to see these things on referrals, would you still have chosen her?

You take a lot if you don't stand up and fight for yourself.

No, if you know why a teacher is poorly behaved you don't therefore have to take it personal (even if they mean it personally). But if they have little to give anyway, don't hang around.

Here's a picture of one of my early piano teachers. She always used the ruler on me and spanked me into submission.



Just kidding! Actually, I wouldn't mind having a teacher like this!

There is a big difference between a good teacher with high standards who lets you know when you didn't perform up to your best...and an abusive teacher who guts a student's confidence and makes them feel like an untalented hack when they have worked hard.

In some cases it is a case of "the emperor's new clothes"...no one wants to be the one who stands up and says, "This teacher is on a power trip and not a good teacher" because everyone else is so impressed because they are so famous or won such-and-such competition or who taught so-and-so who is so famous now. And in a case where the school's reputation stands to suffer if it comes out that the teacher is an abusive jerk, it's no surprise that they don't want to hear complaints.

The post on the other forum ("Nerves About Lessons" in Pianist Corner) that the OP of this thread referred to, was by a student who had been a very successful student until (if I remember right) undergrad, where s/he had a teacher who said such hateful things to him/her that now (in grad school...at Indiana I think) the student still has no confidence.