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#1538351 - 10/18/10 08:11 PM I. Am. Livid.
ToriAnais Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/24/08
Posts: 244
Loc: Australia
*rant warning*

I teach piano at a primary school, and back in august/september it was suggested we have a concert for all the students learning an instrument at the school, which was then delayed as the instrumental teacher quit and there wasn't really a good facility to have it anyway.

The music teacher suggested we waited until the opening of the new school hall instead, which made sense to me as I would have more time to prepare my students keeping this concert in mind. I've been having students keep up pieces that we've finished working on, so that when the concert came around they could perform something they were super confident with and have a good experience.

Today, I discovered (through a student asking if I'm coming!) that the official opening for the hall is next week! I haven't been told, I haven't been invited, and one of my students who has been learning piano for over a year has signed herself up to play freaking ode to joy (baby version). While i know it's not all about me, I can't help feeling that people will be going "hasn't M been learning piano for at least a year? Her teacher must be *^#%!"

I'm so angry and disappointed that my students won't have a chance to perform, and on a selfish note, that i miss a great opportunity for advertising. Don't you agree this is just SO WRONG?!?!?
_________________________
Piano teacher since August 2008.

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#1538441 - 10/18/10 10:50 PM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
DadAgain Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/09/09
Posts: 365
Loc: Brisbane, QLD
Sounds a bit off.

Do you generally get on OK with the music teacher? Is this the start of some kind of turf war? Classroom teacher v Instrumental teacher?

I know in my daughters school theres a recent discussion about HALVING the amount of classroom music taught to save money (We have a new principal who seems intent in doing his utmost to disband as much school community activity as possible - he even talked about cutting the amount of sport taught in school too... Something I never imagined would be on the agenda in Australian schools).

Anyway - perhaps your classroom music teacher is under pressure to prove their worth and is not keen to highlight that others are involved in music education within the school as well?
_________________________
Parent....
Orchestral Viola player (stictly amateur)....
Hack Pianist.... (faded skills from glory days 20 yrs ago)
Vague Guitar & Bass player.... (former minor income stream 15 yrs ago)
Former conductor... (been a long time since I was set loose with a magic wand!)

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#1538461 - 10/18/10 11:18 PM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
ToriAnais Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/24/08
Posts: 244
Loc: Australia
On a surface level we get along, but I have long suspected she doesn't like me, and I have VERY little respect for her as a music teacher. I think the problem lies with us having very different ideas about what music education should be.

School music teacher thinks it should be all about having "fun", however I don't think her philosphy is really working. The school choir has about 10 kids in it, none of the kids come to me knowing even the most basic foundations of music theory (my mum is a primary school music teacher and her students can all read notation - these kids don't even know what a staff is), and she has NO control over her classes.

I however have high expectations of my students, and I don't think that is a bad thing as they are excited about their learning and often sit in on other students lessons or come to me for a few spare minutes if they see a kid is late or I am early.

She told me once when I first started teaching there that i had made her feel like a failure as I had gotten results out of a child she had previously been teaching in a group keyboard situation and not managed to spark her with much interest or teach her much. I said (and honestly believed) that a group situation is very different to one on one, particularly with a lively girl like the one in question.

She then warned me twice about kids she found impossible to control that I was about to start teaching, and they became favourites of mine - very energetic and full of personality. Again, different when it's one-on-one, but I think she took that as another affront.

Overall I think she resents me, and justifies her dislike of me by believing I am bad at my job because I make my kids learn rather than playing lots of games.

None-the-less, what she has done is very unprofessional. She shouldn't let a personal grudge get in the way of doing her job, and me doing mine.
_________________________
Piano teacher since August 2008.

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#1538503 - 10/19/10 01:15 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
Dara Offline
1000 Post Club Member

Registered: 06/18/09
Posts: 1035
Loc: west coast island, canada
Originally Posted By: mitts_off
On a surface level we get along, but I have long suspected she doesn't like me, and I have VERY little respect for her as a music teacher. I think the problem lies with us having very different ideas about what music education should be.

School music teacher thinks it should be all about having "fun", however I don't think her philosphy is really working.


How about having some respect for her as a music teacher. Whatever her methods/ideas are and how they differ from yours.

Could you find it within you to approach her in a non confrontational manner, to discuss your concerns and bruised feelings. If you are going to be working in the same school together, why not make an effort to promote some kind of harmony in your different methods. One approach doesn't always fit all. Sometimes it just takes a bit of giving in to one's stance and listening to another, to also be able to express one's own thoughts, feelings and ideas.

To misquote your signature - find your breath, and loose your answers

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#1538536 - 10/19/10 02:41 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
ToriAnais Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/24/08
Posts: 244
Loc: Australia
I would have respect for her approach if it worked, but from what I can see it doesn't. I still *treat* her with respect though, which I am not finding reciprocated.

No, I don't think I can find it in myself to approach her in a non-confrontational manner and so I will just let it go.

For the record, I haven't had a go at her for her way of doing things, or in any way made it appear that I feel that way. I am all for keeping things friendly. I just don't like feeling like people think I suck at my job because I take a different approach to them. If the result is happy, excited kids who are learning, that should be the main thing right?
_________________________
Piano teacher since August 2008.

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#1538546 - 10/19/10 03:30 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
david_a Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/11/09
Posts: 2913
It sounds to me, frankly, as if you wish you were working somewhere else. You might begin exploring that possibility.
_________________________
(I'm a piano teacher.)

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#1538563 - 10/19/10 04:17 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
ToriAnais Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/24/08
Posts: 244
Loc: Australia
No, not really david. I love the kids, and the general vibe of the school. That's why I give a damn.
_________________________
Piano teacher since August 2008.

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#1538647 - 10/19/10 09:07 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
Chris H. Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 10/14/05
Posts: 2919
Loc: UK.
I think it has more to do with the unfortunate lack of respect that many full time staff have for visiting instrumental teachers...........

_________________________
Pianist and piano teacher.

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#1538664 - 10/19/10 09:31 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: Chris H.]
theJourney Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 02/22/07
Posts: 3946
Loc: Banned
Originally Posted By: Chris H.
I think it has more to do with the unfortunate lack of respect that many full time staff have for visiting instrumental teachers...........


Ha ha. That was very funny.

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#1538693 - 10/19/10 10:25 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
John v.d.Brook Offline
7000 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/18/06
Posts: 7393
Loc: Olympia, Washington, USA
Christ, that takes me back, and reminds me of why I chose early on to teach privately.
_________________________
"Those who dare to teach must never cease to learn." -- Richard Henry Dann
Full-time Private Piano Teacher offering Piano Lessons in Olympia, WA. www.mypianoteacher.com
Certified by the American College of Musicians; member NGPT, MTNA, WSMTA, OMTA

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#1538728 - 10/19/10 11:23 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: Chris H.]
Morodiene Offline
Yikes! 10000 Post Club Member

Registered: 04/06/07
Posts: 12056
Loc: Boynton Beach, FL
Originally Posted By: Chris H.
I think it has more to do with the unfortunate lack of respect that many full time staff have for visiting instrumental teachers...........



ROFL! I love being my own boss smile

As to the OP, I would talk directly with the other teacher and let her know what you had been planning. If she does not allow you to have your students play what they've been working on, then perhaps it's time to get someone higher up involved. I woudl be sure to try talking with her yourself, first, though, because administrators will ask you that first thing and send you to do that so they don't have to do anything.
_________________________
private piano/voice teacher - full time
MTNA member
www.valeoconservatory.com
Petrof 9'2 Concert, Yamaha G3, Roland FP-7, Yamaha MOX6, Kawai MP11

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#1539905 - 10/21/10 02:47 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
Pedagogia Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/14/09
Posts: 53
Loc: Australia
To the OP

Some things in a school such as the opening of a new building have already been planned for by administrators and school executives members and thus, some things may just be out of yours and others' control on such occasions.

A new building is no small thing for any school, and if dignitaries will be present, then you can bet everything will have been planned for. It may well be that even the music teacher has had some specific requests asked of them for the event, or not, so just take it as it comes.

Best you can do is to ask if there is an opportunity for some of your students to be involved in the event. See where that takes you.

If it is not the response you are hoping for, then leave it at that. After all, it is a school event.

Best wishes
BB

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#1544346 - 10/27/10 12:24 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
wavelength Offline
Full Member

Registered: 11/23/07
Posts: 340
Loc: Vermont, USA
You feel that you have been purposefully and unfairly left out, but you are unwilling to talk to anyone about it. I get the impression that you will be holding a grudge, and that will make your situation worse and worse. You should talk to those involved, and clear the air.


Edited by wavelength (10/27/10 12:24 AM)

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#1544374 - 10/27/10 01:41 AM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
ToriAnais Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/24/08
Posts: 244
Loc: Australia
No, it's ok, I'm over it now. I'm one of those lucky people who can't stay angry for long. I feel sort of foolish now for getting so worked up over it.

Also the music teacher came up to me the day before the concert and asked if I had any students wanting to perform, I said in a friendly offhand way nar it's a bit too short notice, and she she said it was mainly group performances for this concert and that we'd have a musical evening later for solo performances.

I was really more upset that she'd said one thing and then sort of reniged on it without speaking to me about it or even letting me know, but I have moved on now. Ce la vie!
_________________________
Piano teacher since August 2008.

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#1545075 - 10/27/10 11:33 PM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
sarah_elizabeth Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/21/09
Posts: 466
Loc: Texas, U.S.
I'm glad you're feeling better now. smile Certainly it was a difficult situation, and I would have been just as upset about it if I were you. I must say that I wouldn't have gotten over it as well as you have, though. wink Good luck!

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#1545451 - 10/28/10 01:53 PM Re: I. Am. Livid. [Re: ToriAnais]
TimR Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 08/17/04
Posts: 3220
Loc: Virginia, USA
Originally Posted By: ToriAnais
On a surface level we get along, but I have long suspected she doesn't like me, and I have VERY little respect for her as a music teacher. I think the problem lies with us having very different ideas about what music education should be.



Perhaps I could tell a short story. Long ago, I worked for an organization which better remain nameless and undescribed. One of my coworkers was a fairly unpleasant woman who did not appear to be either intelligent or competent, plus she blatantly played favorites and encouraged cliques. Yet, pretty much everyone treated her with exaggerated admiration and respect. Not me, of course. I was never unprofessional or discourteous, that just isn't my nature. But I didn't see any particular reason to go out of my way to act sycophantically. And then. The boss changed, there was a brief power vacuum, and before I knew it i was fired.

What happened? I didn't ask the obvious question. Why would someone who did not seem to be all that competent have so much perceived importance? I was missing something. I was missing her connections. I lacked situational awareness.

To some extent the same thing may have happened here.

The OP may have thought she was being circumspect about her dislike for the other teacher, but some people have sensitive antenna for these things, and she knew. The OP did not realize the extent to which the other teacher was more politically adept. These two errors are the OPs fault, not the other teacher's. Fortunately they are easily remedied.
_________________________
gotta go practice

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