Hi,

Currently I am working on my 2nd and 3rd compositions. I would like to get feedback on what I have done so far. Because after completing the song it will be hard to change things. If it sounds dull on the first phrase itself I can atleast quit the idea.

Song1

Song2


Please tell me what you feel. Thanks

Also provide a name for the song according to the mood if you like it

If the links are not working please let me know

The issue that I have for these songs is that they sound like introductions to something, but don’t sound to me like the actual Songs themselves. They basically role around the same line, the same musical idea with almost no development, in this case when there is no development, the actual short 'intro' must be so moving and so deep, and so impressive that it will take care of the lack of development. The way it is now at its current state, is that the melodies themselves (the introductions) don’t portray anything extraordinary or unique, but something that anyone playing around with the keyboard and has some basic music background can write, and also it lacks in development, and that makes it 2 strikes.

So if you're not so good in development at least say something that will catch the attention of the listeners and move them.

But if you cant convey deep feelings through music, at least create an interesting and innovative development.

Any weakness must be taken care of by a strength that you have. And I believe that any musician has those strengths, he just needs to find them...

Regards,

Saul

Very nice work. There is definitely a New Age feel to it. If I may just say one thing, I don't know if having both pieces in the same key is a great idea. I just makes them sound too similar. Apart from that, I thought it was pretty good.

Thanks Saul and Jorgebol


@Saul

I think you didnt missed the title WIP- Work in Progress

These are the first phrase of the songs. I was pretty sure that you wont like it because whatever I make leans to New Age feel and I think it will never sound like classic thing.
I know that your taste is different than that of mine. To be honest I don't like most of the classic type songs posted here.
And from the classic songs these are the only ones I like- Fur Elise, Turkiish March, Moonlite Sonata No1. And most of the others dont convey any emotions to me.

I'm an Indian and it will be always like these type of Indian music rather than piano oriented classic music. That's my weakness. No offense.

@JorgeBol
Those two are in different keys. One in Cmaj and other in Gmaj. It will be evident once song is completed.

Hey, yes I didn’t know what you meant with WIP, but even so my suggestions still stand if you're willing to use them.

As to your statement that most classical music don't convey any emotions, I would say that this is just an erroneous comment. Classical music conveys lots and loads of emotions, Mendelssohn's Songs without words, Chopin's Nocturnes and etudes, Beethoven's Symphonies, and the list goes on, these are people who inspired and touched billions of people all around the world, and I'm sure that if their music didn’t have any emotions no one would have been moved or inspired...

Hey Saul don't get me wrong. I value everyone's comments. What you said is right.

Beethoven, Mozart, Chopin etc. are great composers. What I said is except for some of the classic songs I don't feel like that I am listening to a song. I get bored within 2 mins.

I'm currently in Middle East. If you ever heard Arabian wedding songs you probably gonna hate it. It's more noise than music. I have trouble all the night with that. But they enjoy it.

In the same way, actually it's my problem that I feel like that they are randomly playing some keys rather than a melody. As far as I know, that's what exactly most of the non pianists/common people feel about classic songs. Whenever I tried practicing classic songs everyone around will shouts to stop. But if I play a film song or melody oriented song they are happy.

I am also planning to compose something classy. I don't know anything. I will get back to you soon for more tips.

Cheers

Shabeer