I started playing the piano when I was 15 years old because I wanted to be the keyboard player for Def Leppard. I stopped playing when I finished high school and moved out of my parent's house. I never stopped thinking about playing, and a year ago I bought a piano and started taking lessons. Until recently, it has been a source of pure joy. Now it is a source of fustration and defeat.

It's difficult for me to even try and explain my feelings about this complex instrument. I'm not a quitter. I have an advanced degree and I've been quite successful in my career. So why do I desperately want to quit the piano and give up?

Is there anybody who can relate with me on this?

It looks like we are in the same geographical area: the twin cities, so I will jump in here. I don't really have an answer, but a few questions might help start the conversation.

What are your aspirations on the piano (i.e. classical, play pop tunes from fakebook, improvise, ...)?

How are you going about the process of learning (i.e. with a live teacher, self-study, a combination, ...)?

In general, it seems to me that when I take on too much and/or something too advanced on the piano, then I start to feel as you are describing. My solution is to work backward to progressively easier material until I feel that I can once again make progress. I figure that I am prone to taking too large a step sometimes. Being that I am self-teaching, it is up to me to make sure that I don't overwhelm myself and instead take the time I need to prepare for the more advanced material.

Tony

My aspiration is to enjoy myself and to play the music I love. I do not aspire to be a professional musician. I take 30 minute lessons once a week from a wonderful teacher in my area. She's smart and talented, and I enjoy learning from her. Thank you for your response. I think you're right. I'm choosing music that is quite difficult and I need to slow down. I'm trying to avoid bursting into tears at my next lesson, and your thoughts will help me be more articulate when I let her know I need to slow down.

It's so silly the amount of pressure I put on myself for a hobby.

You are not alone! You know, I read somewhere, I believe it was on the teachers' forum that students really try to rush through intermediate repertoire to "get to" the advanced pieces, but that there's really an enormous amount of lovely literature for the intermediate player and that this instructor wished that students wouldn't be so anxious to get to the big stuff, but really enjoy the variety available in intermediate. I took those words to heart and have so much more enjoyed piano playing, now that I'm not frustrated.

When I was taking lessons, I had to tell the teacher that I wanted to work on easier stuff and we kept backing down, backing down until I felt comfortable. For now, for me, I like to play music that I can somewhat sightread but will take me about two or three weeks to thoroughly learn. Before it'd be like I was hacking away at a piece and NEVER get it to place that I didn't feel like I was failing. Now, improvement is incremental, but I am seeing improvement with the added plus that I'm enjoying making the music.

The challenging pieces will always be there. I think that there is always something that is harder for even the best pianists. It's kind of like how rich is rich? You get the Mercedes and you're looking at the Rolls Royce, but then there's another tier above that. Piano is so deep on so many levels, styles. It can actually be overwhelming. There's not enough time in a lifetime to play all that's out there. So don't think about easing up as a demotion, but as giving yourself time to noodle around some wonderful music while you're developing the technical skills required for the more challenging pieces.

You are not alone here. I've been struggling with this lately. You are getting some excellent advice from the other posters. I had a talk with my teacher about this. He helped me see I'm making good progress on some difficult pieces. Talking with him helped me understand the whole process of learning. "Relax, and enjoy the journey," he advised.

Like you, I realized I was putting the pressure on myself. That isn't necessary, nor desirable.

BTW, it's nice to connect with other Twin Cities residents!

Odd goal considering Def Leppard doesn't have a keyboard player. Maybe you could've convinced them that they needed one.

Putting too much pressure on yourself can be part of it. If playing rock music is your thing, make sure that's what you are learning. I recently wrote an article on why piano students quit, and the biggest issue in my opinion is song selection. If you're not happy with the songs you're learning, it's hard to stay motivated.

I say, take your favorite Def Leppard song and add a keyboard part to it. I do that all the time with bands who don't have keyboards. Make at least part of what you do fun so you don't get so frustrated.

Thank you all for your wisdom and kindness. I'm not sure why piano throws me for such a loop, but I assume this is just another way to continue developing my coping skills. I'm also impressed to see that I got responses from folks in the Twin Cities. And to Brian Lucas: playing keyboards for Def Leppard was more a dream at 15, not so much now. I'm interested in reading your article about why piano students quit. Can you give me the link?

When I went to my first lesson, I handed my teacher the music I wanted to play (some Belle and Sebastian songs and some Guaraldi). She took a look and said "well, it's going to be awhile before you get to that!" I did know this, but she wanted to know what kind of stuff I was interested in. Then I got hooked on the idea of playing some Schumann, some at the easier end of his repertoire. I'm not even ready for that. I'm playing Bach and Krieger minuets now. And I love them. At least it's real music (as opposed to lesson book pieces, which aren't always so musical). Perhaps I haven't gotten too discouraged because I didn't have a lot of hard and fast goals to start with, or because the few I had my teacher and I were realistic about from the start. Or maybe I just haven't hit a rough patch yet.

Hang in there. I can't imagine things won't get better (both your abilities and your feelings about piano) if you stick with it.

And now take a look at Joe Elliot, singing (poorly) with Mott The Hoople on their reunion, and just generally hanging round Ian hunter!!

Everyone gets depressed and despondant at times, but these times will and do pass, these sort of feelings are no respecters of intelligence! they can happen to anybody at anytime.

Things will get better.

If it WAS pure joy at first and NOW has changed to frustration and defeat, it's apparent that something has changed. And I doubt that it's you.
As many others have suggested, it might just be that you're 1) moving too fast 2) demanding too much of yourself 3) choosing (or having chosen for you) material that's beyond you 4) starting to play thing that just plain don't interest you.
You SAY that your aspiration is to enjoy yourself and to play the music that you love. I'm sure that's true of everyone on this forum. But I think it's also true that some tiny little nagging voice is constantly whispering in our ears to be REALLY GOOD at this. We hear great pianists on the radio, and we see tiny little prodigies on TV, and we always focus on the pianist playing the background music for TV programs and commercials. And, consciously or unconsciously, we are always comparing ourselves to them. That can get frustrating.
If you actually truly honestly just want to enjoy yourself and play the music that you love, then do it and let all the rest slide.
Of course, if the music that you love is Bach's "Goldberg Variations" or Chopin's "Fantasie Impromptu," then there might be a problem.

Sure. http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Most-Students-Quit-Piano-Lessons&id=6763566


See! They clearly need a keyboard player!