Not bad. You've got music in you, for sure. I think you have to work to bring out the melody more, though, and let the accompaniment drop into the background. So, take the first measure for example:

BOOM bup-bup-bup BOOM BOOM bup BOOM bup BOOM

not

boom BUP-BUP-BUP boom boom BUP boom BUP boom


The middle section should be much softer than the opening or the recap. The swells are nice, but they have to start from nothing, swell a bit, then go back. They can't eclipse the volume of the opening or recap. The volume at 2:28 is pretty close to where the whole section should be.

At 3:08, work with the pedal.. this section is a very noticeable divergence from the way you played the melody throughout. I think less pedal would be better, to keep it in the same style as the rest of the piece.

At 3:42, try to bring out the pinky in the right hand more. It holds the melody. And just before the leggiero, don't slow down that much. As someone once told me in a different section of the same piece, you lose the tension, the excitement.