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I don't think it's unreasonable to ask people to save the date/time. I issue a calendar at the beginning of the school year. It lists the recital dates and times. They can't say they didn't know.

The recital is one event. They either make time for it or they don't. In my studio, they know it's required. They can miss one of their many soccer games (or whatever) for something that has been scheduled way in advance as a culminating activity for the year.

AZN piano asked, "Given a choice between going to their friend's birthday party or playing at their teacher's studio recital, which one do you think kids will choose?"

In my opinion, kids shouldn't get this choice.

Why not? This is a teachable moment.

I think children who choose to go to party will make that choice no matter if I give 6 months notice or 2 weeks notice. So, it is not about when I give my notice, it is about their prioritization.

Going back to the original post, in both cases the parents asked if a change was possible, and the answer was that a change is not possible.

I don't see anything in the thread indicating that the parent in either case expected the change. All I know from the original post is that they asked. How could they ever find out without asking?

What happened next might be more telling.
Did they curse you? Swear? Tantrum? Withdraw the student?
Or just make the decision between one activity and the other and carry on.

AZN - my daughter wouldn't get to make a choice - by taking lessons, she has already committed. But we are pretty good with making things work (maybe go to the party and leave early or arrive late to the party or plan an outing with the birthday kid the next weekend).

The teachable moment is in not giving the choice. We honor our commitments.

No.

However, both moms asked twice. After I said the first no and briefly explain, they asked again as if they cannot believe that I CANNOT do anything for them. Then the second time I explain it in a longer and more details way.

What you think?

Good for you! I'm sure your daughter's teacher is very happy to work with you.

A similar thing happened to my business partner yesterday. The parent had called and left a voice mail saying that it was just too much to drive to the studio (which she says is a half hour away, and that really isn't true, it takes me to drive a half hour and I live 2 towns over, she lives in the same town) and then for him to have an hour lesson it takes just too much time. So she had this great idea: why not just teach the lessons in her home? That way she can teach him an hour and they can save the supposed hour commute!

I advised her not to even bother responding to the voice mail and if she brought it up at lessons she would just say absolutely not. So lo and behold she brought it up and she was told no, it won't work. The parent kept arguing though, and so my partner kept giving her the same answer. This went on for a little while.

Then at the end of the kid's lesson, the mom is just sitting there chatting away and not moving a muscle. My partner was all packed up and ready to go home (last lesson of the day) and here this lady is just sitting there wanting to gab. Wasn't she just complaining about not having any time for driving and having an hour lesson? Isn't she just so strapped for time she can't do the commute??

"...The parent kept arguing though, and so my partner kept giving her the same answer...Then at the end of the kid's lesson, the mom is just sitting there chatting away and not moving a muscle. My partner was all packed up and ready to go home (last lesson of the day) and here this lady is just sitting there wanting to gab..."

This is not actual conversation, but a wisp of a veil as a guise for a naked pressure tactic, trying to soften the teacher up for yet another attempt to get her way. "She'll say yes to anything to get me out the door so she can close up."

No reply need be made, except, "Closing time, got to go." Then, turn out the lights, lock the door, and leave. This will flush out the parent's real agenda, and again no reply should be offered other than, "I'm sorry, but the answer is still No." Forestall 'talking about it another time' by saying, "Check your e-mail."

But of course there is no e-mail. The parent is in the parking lot, the door is locked, and that is the answer.

These things are easy enough to handle if you ask yourself, "What would I say to a four-year-old bully who was doing this?"

Obnoxious and clueless.
The kids' are probably overcommitted.
Sorry.

My teacher has an upcharge for lessons given in your home. That seems reasonable.

This student's parent has completely set herself up for this tactic as well. "Since you're asking me to commute 30 minutes each way, I'm sure you won't begrudge me billing for another hour of my time, since that's an hour not available for another student."

+1

What a novel concept. The piano lessons are about the student!

Being a piano teacher means being in the professional personal services business. This is not 1789 or 1812. People's expectations are formed by the state of the art kind of service that they receive every day working with other professionals.

A good service business is customer-service-oriented. It tailors its services to the individual needs of its customers. "No" in a huff is easy. The funny thing is giving customers options can be just as easy, but requires proactive thinking and planning and communication on the part of the teacher. Unless one is the only or best piano teacher in the county, sooner or later one will have to act like a real professional business.

Thing is we just rented out this very nice space and we have to pay the rent if we use it or not. This lady knows the change she's made, and is also a businessowner herself. She offered to pay more but the problem isn't the money, but if my partner drives to her house, her other students will find out and want that too, and she doesn't want to do that. That is not how we have set up our business.

This is very true. I recently had rescheduled a lesson for a student who had cancelled the lesson with plenty of advance notice. Since it was on my day off I offered to teach form my home (which is closer for both me and the student than my studio). She didn't show. Then the mom contacted me and asked if we could reschedule. I was really mad and not going to, knowing I didn't have to, but after calming down my partner pointed out that I should do it just this once but let her know that normally no-shows don't get rescheduled. I did and I'm glad that I did. The student loves to sing and the mom drives her to lessons twice a week, so she really supports her daughter.

Sometimes it's easy to get offended by something that really most likely had nothing to do with you.

Agree 100%, and some more. The lessons are about the students. There is no need to read too much into a parent’s request. If you can accommodate them, do; if you can’t, don’t. It’s just like almost everyone reschedules a doctor’s appointment once in a while. It’s almost never personal. It’s just a fact of life that our daily activities are not always predictable and people have the right to set their own priorities. Speculating on their motives is not necessary when there is no evidence, or even when there is some evidence. It is also worth keeping in mind that what one “reads” from a communication may not be what the other party “means” anyways because communication is not perfect.

But there are other reasons why my family always tries to accommodate our teachers’ rescheduling requests and they try to accommodate ours. After taking lessons for a while, we and our teachers understand each other very well, we’ve become friends with almost all teachers. We know that they care deeply about students and are very responsible, but they are busy people and have many responsibilities. They know that our family cares deeply about learning and my kids are serious students BUT they don’t regard each activity as being equal, some have higher priorities than others, and a family has tons of other things to do besides lessons. I think these facts are quite easy to accept. So when conflicts happen, we all try our best to make each other’s life a bit easier.

Hello dear!
I think we are a little bit off topic here.
I am not talking about request to rescheduling or to make up a piano weekly lesson that a student missed here. I am talking about....
--PIANO TEST
--PIANO RECITAL

Piano test: I do not have control over it. It is not that I can't be flexible to make everyone else life easier. Do you think MTAC can be more flexible? The answer is no. Only student who is grade 9 and up can request a make up test and the extra fee is $55. That means if you are Grade 5, and you figure that you can't make it to the test means you just have to skip it and wasting your preparation and registration fee. Even with doctor's note, a sick Grade 5 student cannot granted a make up test! I personally do not like this rule either. As many of you says here: "Piano lesson is about students, not teacher". I like to tell MTAC too that "Piano test is about students, not teachers!"

Piano recital: If student show up at the wrong recital time, of course I will just announce it and make them play in the current recital. However, if parents ask in advance, there should be a cut off line (mine is 1 week before recital) to ask for change. One parent did ask for change but she did ask right away when I announce the recital time one month ago, so, I change it for her. This mom2 actually ask three days before my recital. So, I have to kindly say no.

About policy of rescheduling and make up lesson:
Mine policy says parents has to give me 15 minutes notice to have a credit for future make up lesson. I think I am pretty flexible compare to many teachers here require 24 hours notice to cancel a lesson and to receive credit for future. About make up time I am very flexible to it too because as most of you saying it is about the student, not me.

So, at this point, I think most of you get confused between piano lesson vs piano recital vs piano test that I am talking about here.

Regarding the MTAC CM exam: Our small branch has over 200 students participating. When registering the repertoire, there is a place to indicate time preference, both for which evaluation day and morning/afternoon.

I sent out my query to parents for time requests 2 weeks before I had to enter the information. Only 2 parents responded, so I indicated no special request for the rest. I got several complaints when they were assigned a time they didn't like, but when I referred them back to the email I had sent, they understood they were at fault.

Our CM chair does her best to accommodate changes, but it's nearly impossible when students have differing lengths of evaluation time based on the level entered. We are welcome to switch them within our own studios as long as we switch students with the same length time slot.

I don't honestly believe there is a solution that MTAC can provide.

Thank you MinnieMay



Our branch has over 1500 students, I believe, I might be wrong.

When registering the repertoire, I let the parents decide the time preference. This Mom1 pick Saturday morning, so, I follow what she pick. I registered it as what she wanted back in September.

Now in February, she wants a different time, which now she prefer Sunday afternoon because "something comes up" (I do not know what is that). So, I have to say no to her.

I would not expect them to pick a suitable time in September. You can't register the time preference until after January 2, so I wait until then to ask. Perhaps if you wait until then, you will have more satisfied. parents.