Piano World Home Page Forums Our Most Popular Forums Piano Teachers Forum Help me read my teachers mind.

Maybe, but you have a great sense of humour!

Oh my goodness. This thread is overwhelming.

I wanted to add my voice to those saying you should talk to a good therapist. The impression that I got from this thread is that you're spinning off in 20 different directions. I also think you've received a ton of advice that is exactly, 100% correct - but it seems to bounce off of you as you spin in a new direction. You keep saying, "tell me more!" and "what about this!" and even when Keystring said she was done responding, you tagged on a few more questions in your response.

A good therapist will help you understand how you process information, how you interact with others, why you seek approval, how you can be more confident and not need that approval, how to work more effectively towards your goals, etc.

I had one other thought for you, on this idea of wanting to know if you have the potential to be a pro at this.

The people who are successful in really difficult, competitive fields - don't generally ask people if they're going to be successful. They don't spend their time looking for approval or affirmation of their choices.

They CHOOSE it. They say, "I am going to be THIS." And then, they work their butts off to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

It's like the story of the guy who wanted to be a violinist. He had the chance to meet and play for a famous violinist who he admired greatly.

After playing he said, "Please, I respect you so much. I have to know... do I have what it takes to do this professionally?"

And the master said, "I am so sorry to tell you, but no, you do not. You should give up now." The man gave up, went off and got an ordinary job, and decades later, had the chance to talk to the famous violinist again.

This time he said, "You should never have told me to give up! I might have succeeded! You had no way of knowing if I would be any good" - and the famous violinist replied, "If you had what it took, you would have ignored what I said and kept going anyway."

I know, getting positive feedback from our teachers and those we respect is important, and encouraging. But if you choose to do this professionally, that has to come from inside of you. Having someone tell you that you're good enough is really pretty meaningless - it doesn't make the path easier, or the hours longer. It doesn't give you any shortcuts, the ONLY way you get to succeed is by working incredibly hard and staying focusing on achieving your goal.

OK, I had one more thought for you. At 17, you're on the verge of adulthood. I can't really tell from these posts exactly what the issue is with your teacher, but, I can tell you what your options, as an adult, are to deal with it.

1. You accept things are they are. Don't try to change the teacher, and stop going over and over this in your head. Make the best of what you have.

2. You talk to your teacher. You might ask for more feedback, or more encouragement, or whatever. You should know, just because you ask, doesn't mean you get. She might not be willing to give what you want/need, or might be unable to. But, it allows you to have an adult conversation about your needs, and how you are interacting.

3. You find a new teacher who you are able to work better with.

That's it! You get to pick which option is best for this situation. And you might mess up, because that's part of what happens to ALL of us, even when we get older. We're all constantly learning how to interact with others, how to be patient with others, how to help each other out, and what works.

Good luck to you.

Try giving up the need for her approval. Approval-seeking behavior can be very destructive to your own happiness.

This teacher is there to help you. If she still works with you, she obviously thinks you are doing a good enough job. And you can only be helped in the long run by working with someone you admire.

WHAT'S NORMAL ABOUT A 17 YEAR OLD HAVING SEXUALS FEELINGS TO A .... =="

Of course I'm a great kid, tell me something I don't already know. :pp I'm a brat, I'm a pianist, I'm rude, I'm a SCIENTIST, I'm too good for people my age, I'm gifted, I'm psyched, I have a clutch, I'm azn, I can read minds, I make special threads, I'm popular online, I spell people's name right, (apology not accepted, prepare to be further chastised in the future poly) I play violin, I'm capricious, I'm people pleasing. I mean look!!! Got the whole package in this one!!!

If I was your student would you like me? HMMMMMMM????.....

A damsel in distress results in overwhelming threads. :pp



Yeah coz the more I'm given the more I have to analyze. It can't hurt. You can always have questions! I see it as a good thing!



Yeah but I don't just want approval! I want it to be true! To have earned it. When I get it, if I get it, I want it to have come from inside! I don't mind the hours, I enjoy them. But yeah, the staying focused thing...



I have been!



Thank you.

Thanks. Wow, I know you and you probably know my teacher! This freakes me out. I mean this site is obviously popular. What if she's seen....

You never know...

Interesting topic. The only problem is that this subject is not exactly in line with the purpose of this forum. I have even received a moderator report speculating as to whether it's even healthy.

Musiqientist, I'll just ask this.. Are you looking to make this teacher your girlfriend? Have you ever had a girlfriend? If you suddenly became acquainted with a young lady who became your girlfriend, would impressing this teacher lose its importance?

You do not even have to answer these questions on the forum. It's none of my business anyway. I only ask in order to prompt you to ask them of yourself.

I remember that when I was 17, EVERYTHING seemed like it was a life or death emergency. Then as you get older you suddenly realize that many of these "emergencies" were trivial. I guess it's all about perspective. They say live and learn, and there is a lot of wisdom to that.

Do you have a trusted, wise, older friend you can talk to about this? Someone who is level headed and does not seem impulsive, one who enjoys a measure of success in life and is balanced with family, friends, and career? If so, I would advise talking to this friend. That's one way I stayed sane at 17!

For now I will leave the topic open, but I am really close to closing it.

Take a DEEP breath and relax. In 10 years you will be able to look back and wonder why you made such a big deal about this...

Teenagers!

OMGGG!!!!! He's in a good mood!!!!!!!!!

Healthy for what? What would be then next thing that would cause you to close the topic? I honestly think that this honestly still is about piano overall.



...I'm female. *huff* And not homosexual.
Anyways, I actually thought about this seriously and know that if I got a boyfriend, things wouldn't change. And no I've never dated. The issues with piano will still lurk around. It really doesn't have too much to do with her. But for me, she's directly related to my playing somehow. I know that's like a repeat.



No.



If I succeed that may happen. Everything about piano is important now.

Listen to the people with experience and hindsight about these things. EVERYONE feels this way at the age of 17. Everything is a big deal, everything is a life-or-death situation, any bad decision you make will ruin your entire life. Just relax - it doesn't matter as much as you think it does.

One thing life has taught me..

If we do things to please others we often fail.

If we do things for ourselves they work out better.

Oh, you're female.. Glad we cleared that up. One never knows when real names are not used.

Ha. Sometimes one *still* doesn't know that with real names...