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#2097631 - 06/07/13 04:10 AM Miniature no. 1 re-score
JoelW Online   content
5000 Post Club Member

Registered: 05/25/12
Posts: 5357
Loc: USA
This is a piece that I composed and shared last year. It's my first composition but I decided to re-score it because I feel I've learned a lot since then. How does it look?

http://pdfuploader.com/uppdfs/781/Miniature_no__1.pdf

Do all of those decrescendos work? I'm sure you know what they're trying to convey. If you know a better way, please tell.

Thanks.


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#2097659 - 06/07/13 06:51 AM Re: Miniature no. 1 re-score [Re: JoelW]
Schubertslieder Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/02/13
Posts: 373
Loc: Michigan, USA
If a single mezzo piano has 8 decrescendos following, ordering it to go gradually softer, does it mean to go pianississississississimo? smile

I think if you put mezzo piano or some other dynamic sign before each decrescendos, it would be a bit more clear.

Cheers!
_________________________
Charles Peck (American)--Metropolitan
Debussy--various pieces
Grieg--various pieces

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#2097665 - 06/07/13 07:01 AM Re: Miniature no. 1 re-score [Re: JoelW]
Nikolas Online   content
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 6258
Loc: UK
The idea of dimin. dimin. dimin. dimin. is confusing. I think that you probably mean that you go softer, then suddenly louder and softer, then louder and softer, etc... But it doesn't make sense and appears to be too complicated...
_________________________
http://www.musica-ferrum.com

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#2097812 - 06/07/13 11:54 AM Re: Miniature no. 1 re-score [Re: JoelW]
Polyphonist Online   content
8000 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/03/13
Posts: 8738
Loc: New York City
The harmonies at the beginning of the piece bear a surprising resemblance to those in a certain one of Chopin's Waltzes. grin

Technical stuff:

Since the time signature is Presto, wouldn't each measure be a beat, in a way? Normally you'd connect the beams of the notes within each measure, rather than separating them into groups of 2 as you did here.

Bar 16 - 2nd and 3rd RH notes should be E# and F#, not F natural and Gb.

Bar 17 - 4th RH note should probably be a D# and not an Eb because of the key signature.

Bar 19 - 2nd RH note, same as above.

I'd redo the bar spacing and add a measure to the last line; it looks too spread out right now.
_________________________
Regards,

Polyphonist

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#2097862 - 06/07/13 01:01 PM Re: Miniature no. 1 re-score [Re: JoelW]
Schubertslieder Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/02/13
Posts: 373
Loc: Michigan, USA
Joel and Nikolas, I sent you a PM so please read it because it won't bite. smile.
It is to help you, wink.
_________________________
Charles Peck (American)--Metropolitan
Debussy--various pieces
Grieg--various pieces

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#2098034 - 06/07/13 05:57 PM Re: Miniature no. 1 re-score [Re: JoelW]
Schubertslieder Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/02/13
Posts: 373
Loc: Michigan, USA
I sight read through the first page just now and it sounds nice. When I get a chance maybe I will go through it all. smile

Nice work, cheers!
_________________________
Charles Peck (American)--Metropolitan
Debussy--various pieces
Grieg--various pieces

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