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#2092723 - 05/31/13 09:03 AM Nocturne in F major - Original Composition
mpmusic Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 101
Loc: Portugal
Hello,

This is my most recent composition for piano, a Nocturne in F major. I’m posting this here because I’m self-learning at piano and composition and if you could give some feedback it would be great.

I’ve the sheet music available for free download on my website.
[Op. 3 No. 2 - Nocturne in F major]

I know I may have used some uncommon notation but again, I have not a good background on music theory. I'm working on that.



Thanks in advance,
Miguel
_________________________
http://www.miguelmotapinto.com/
http://youtube.com/user/miguelmotapinto

"Music is the key to understand the universe..."

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#2093027 - 05/31/13 05:45 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
Schubertslieder Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/02/13
Posts: 373
Loc: Michigan, USA
Hi and nice playing.

I read your score and listened to your playing of Nocturne in FM.

Immediately I noticed dissonance of 2nd interval throughout the piece, and this creates a problem. One example would be on measure 7, on the downbeat or the first beat, there is an A on the right hand and G on the left thus creating dissonance.

Dissonance should be avoided as much as possible.

Best
_________________________
Charles Peck (American)--Metropolitan
Debussy--various pieces
Grieg--various pieces

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#2093035 - 05/31/13 06:02 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Schubertslieder]
Steve Chandler Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 02/18/05
Posts: 2737
Loc: Urbandale, Iowa
Originally Posted By: Schubertslieder
Hi and nice playing.

I read your score and listened to your playing of Nocturne in FM.

Immediately I noticed dissonance of 2nd interval throughout the piece, and this creates a problem. One example would be on measure 7, on the downbeat or the first beat, there is an A on the right hand and G on the left thus creating dissonance.

Dissonance should be avoided as much as possible.

I disagree vehemently. Dissonance is not to be avoided, resolved usually (but not always). Without dissonance Bach would lack the spice that makes his music so effective. In bar 7 the A can be heard as a ninth that resolves in the very next beat. That's essentially a suspension, except that the note is an octave lower in the previous bar. My advice is to do it more, similar to using parallel fifths. If you're going to use them do it a lot so that it's obviously intentional.

Your piece is nice, somewhat reminiscent of Chopin, somewhat different. I think if I were to compose a Nocturne I'd want to get farther from Chopin, otherwise it' sounds like pastiche.

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#2093264 - 06/01/13 10:01 AM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
mpmusic Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 101
Loc: Portugal
Thank you for the suggestions! I have to agree with Steve. The dissonances, from what I’ve read so far, play an important role in the piece, they help to build tension that will eventually be resolved next.

This nocturne is somewhat reminiscent of Chopin its true. Chopin nocturnes are a big reference for me, some of them are among my favorite piano pieces ever. But now I'm begining to learn some Mozart and Bach and I guess it will be a good help to increase my "vocabulary" on composition smile
_________________________
http://www.miguelmotapinto.com/
http://youtube.com/user/miguelmotapinto

"Music is the key to understand the universe..."

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#2093337 - 06/01/13 01:28 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
Polyphonist Offline
7000 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/03/13
Posts: 7598
Loc: New York City
Originally Posted By: mpmusic
Chopin nocturnes are a big reference for me, some of them are among my favorite piano pieces ever.

Even though you used a comma splice, you at least haven't called the nocturnes "songs" like so many ignorant young "musicians" nowadays. laugh
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Polyphonist

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#2093349 - 06/01/13 02:00 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Polyphonist]
mpmusic Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 101
Loc: Portugal
That’s true, I see that happening a lot on youtube, in comments... I think it's an insult for such great masterpieces! But at least those people like to hear the music. There are lots of young people who don't listen to classical music and some of them say they don't like it! It's really strange shocked


Edited by mpmusic (06/01/13 02:01 PM)
_________________________
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http://youtube.com/user/miguelmotapinto

"Music is the key to understand the universe..."

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#2093381 - 06/01/13 02:54 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
Polyphonist Offline
7000 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/03/13
Posts: 7598
Loc: New York City
Originally Posted By: mpmusic
That’s true, I see that happening a lot on youtube, in comments... I think it's an insult for such great masterpieces!

Finally someone who gets it! And it's not only on Youtube, it's here as well - a specialized piano site! wink

Originally Posted By: mpmusic
There are lots of young people who don't listen to classical music and some of them say they don't like it! It's really strange shocked

There is no hope for these people. Just ignore them and let them listen to the trash music they enjoy. Meanwhile, you can enjoy the good music classical music.
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Polyphonist

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#2093846 - 06/02/13 10:35 AM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
Schubertslieder Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/02/13
Posts: 373
Loc: Michigan, USA
Congratulation on your composition, being a self-taught composer!
I do hope you find my post helpful.

In your composition, I do see leading tone never resolve and there are many places, not to mention augmented 5ths, thus dissonance.

It wouldn't hurt to look at your score more closely.

Good luck
_________________________
Charles Peck (American)--Metropolitan
Debussy--various pieces
Grieg--various pieces

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#2094609 - 06/03/13 02:42 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
Michael Sayers Offline
1000 Post Club Member

Registered: 02/15/13
Posts: 1125
Loc: Stockholms ln, Sverige
I heard enough here that was of interest (.e.g., the 3:17 - 4:00 section) that I downloaded all your available scores for a look.

Are you asking about notation or about the music?

If that section of time listed isn't a one off then I feel you should keep composing.

I might send an email later . . . (not a PM through pianoworld).

Mvh,
Michael

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#2094752 - 06/03/13 06:11 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Michael Sayers]
mpmusic Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 101
Loc: Portugal
Originally Posted By: Michael Sayers
I heard enough here that was of interest (.e.g., the 3:17 - 4:00 section) that I downloaded all your available scores for a look.

Are you asking about notation or about the music?

If that section of time listed isn't a one off then I feel you should keep composing.

I might send an email later . . . (not a PM through pianoworld).

Mvh,
Michael


Thank you smile I'm asking about the music but if you could give some advice about the notation it would be great. I think my problem is that I haven't good background on music theory. I play the piano more seriously since last year and in the guitar (I play since 2007) I badly read sheet music. So when I'm composing I've usually difficulties finding the way to represent in the sheet music what I exactly want and as I improve in playing technique I want to include more challenging parts in my compositions and I take lots of time to write what I want in the paper when the rhythm it’s a little more complex.

Because of that I usually in the difficult parts write with a “pseudo-notation” that means I write basically the notes without representing the rhythm and even the measures not well placed. And I of course have to remember the rhythm. Then when the piece is finished I try, in the notation software, to organize the everything in such way that sounds what I want.
_________________________
http://www.miguelmotapinto.com/
http://youtube.com/user/miguelmotapinto

"Music is the key to understand the universe..."

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#2096695 - 06/06/13 01:26 AM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Polyphonist]
Hamburg-D Offline
500 Post Club Member

Registered: 06/04/13
Posts: 513
Originally Posted By: Polyphonist
Originally Posted By: mpmusic
Chopin nocturnes are a big reference for me, some of them are among my favorite piano pieces ever.

Even though you used a comma splice, you at least haven't called the nocturnes "songs" like so many ignorant young "musicians" nowadays. laugh



Oh common smile nothing wrong with "songs".
Chanson! Better? (Sans Paroles)

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#2096701 - 06/06/13 01:37 AM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Hamburg-D]
Polyphonist Offline
7000 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/03/13
Posts: 7598
Loc: New York City
Originally Posted By: noambenhamou
Oh common smile nothing wrong with "songs".

The issue that some people (including me) have with it is that it's confusing to refer to everything as a "song," so it's impossible to tell whether you mean an actual vocal work or an instrumental composition.
_________________________
Regards,

Polyphonist

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#2096709 - 06/06/13 01:55 AM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Polyphonist]
Hamburg-D Offline
500 Post Club Member

Registered: 06/04/13
Posts: 513
Originally Posted By: Polyphonist
Originally Posted By: noambenhamou
Oh common smile nothing wrong with "songs".

The issue that some people (including me) have with it is that it's confusing to refer to everything as a "song," so it's impossible to tell whether you mean an actual vocal work or an instrumental composition.


Believe me, I get what you're saying smile was just trying to be difficult smile

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#2097556 - 06/06/13 11:23 PM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: mpmusic]
Derulux Offline
5000 Post Club Member

Registered: 06/06/05
Posts: 5314
Loc: Philadelphia
What a lovely song!

In terms of composition, I think you lose the phrase with the odd 3-bar repeat, but the effect wasn't undesirable, so if it was intended, I would consider leaving it be.

At the andante before the recap.. have you considered a ritard with the andante starting at the recap? The sudden change coming out of the triplet phrasing might be softened that way. Otherwise, you really have to sell the fermata on the downbeat.

This one, take with a grain of salt, because it may steer you closer to Chopin rather than distancing yourself from him... but consider embellishing the recap. Do something different with it. I like the "return to home" feel, but if you can make it somehow appear different, it will sell a "catharsis" in the piece. Err, sorry, song. wink
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Every day we are afforded a new chance. The problem with life is not that you run out of chances. In the end, what you run out of are days.

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#2097652 - 06/07/13 06:12 AM Re: Nocturne in F major - Original Composition [Re: Derulux]
mpmusic Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 101
Loc: Portugal
Originally Posted By: Derulux

In terms of composition, I think you lose the phrase with the odd 3-bar repeat, but the effect wasn't undesirable, so if it was intended, I would consider leaving it be.

It was intended the 3-bar repeat.

Originally Posted By: Derulux

At the andante before the recap.. have you considered a ritard with the andante starting at the recap? The sudden change coming out of the triplet phrasing might be softened that way. Otherwise, you really have to sell the fermata on the downbeat.

I agree with to selling the fermata smile

Originally Posted By: Derulux

This one, take with a grain of salt, because it may steer you closer to Chopin rather than distancing yourself from him... but consider embellishing the recap. Do something different with it. I like the "return to home" feel, but if you can make it somehow appear different, it will sell a "catharsis" in the piece. Err, sorry, song. wink


I thought about that and maybe I will do it when I decide to review it and in my future compositions.

Thanks for the suggestions! smile And I forgive you for call it "song" :P

Miguel
_________________________
http://www.miguelmotapinto.com/
http://youtube.com/user/miguelmotapinto

"Music is the key to understand the universe..."

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