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Topic Options
#2287037 - 06/07/14 04:05 PM Piano Complaints
Riddler Offline
500 Post Club Member

Registered: 05/13/05
Posts: 774
Loc: Florida
"People might think I'm a weirdo, but a piano needs love. I talk to them, ask them how they've been, ask them if everybody has been treating them right." - Hiromi Uehara, jazz pianist.

I dunno. If I imagine a chat with my piano, it's nothing but a monologue directed squarely at me - a long litany of complaints about being treated with no dignity, being pounded on, cursed at, blamed for my klunkers, walked on by the cat, etc!

The cat part, I get; but as for the rest of it, pianos oughta toughen up, that's all part of their job and they darn well oughta do it without complaint.

At least that's my ^&*(#*)$*#@ opinion.

Ed
_________________________
http://edsjazzpianopage.blogspot.com/

My fingers are slow, but easily keep pace with my thoughts.


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#2287059 - 06/07/14 04:53 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
bennevis Offline
8000 Post Club Member

Registered: 10/14/10
Posts: 8099
Some people (including Royalty wink ) talk to plants. Helps them to grow, apparently.

Acoustic pianos are made of living wood too, though I believe they'd stopped growing.......
_________________________
"I don't play accurately - anyone can play accurately - but I play with wonderful expression. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life."

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#2287138 - 06/07/14 09:46 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
earlofmar Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/21/13
Posts: 2762
Loc: Australia
Originally Posted By: Riddler

The cat part, I get; but as for the rest of it, pianos oughta toughen up, that's all part of their job and they darn well oughta do it without complaint.


Ed


I believe Yamaha's have their souls removed at the factory
_________________________
If this life is a simulation can I not be in the easy version where Bach was a drummer

XL, XXXVIII-9-XXX

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#2287190 - 06/08/14 01:28 AM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
Dave B Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 08/01/11
Posts: 2560
Loc: Philadelphia area
I got into an argument with my piano and now it won't talk to me. Flowers didn't work. Should I try chocolates?

Enjoy.
_________________________
"Imagine it in all its primatic colorings, its counterpart in our souls - our souls that are great pianos whose strings, of honey and of steel, the divisions of the rainbow set twanging, loosing on the air great novels of adventure!" - William Carlos Williams

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#2287255 - 06/08/14 08:19 AM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Dave B]
bennevis Offline
8000 Post Club Member

Registered: 10/14/10
Posts: 8099
Originally Posted By: Dave B
I got into an argument with my piano and now it won't talk to me. Flowers didn't work. Should I try chocolates?


It's definitely worth trying.

I've noticed that my (digital) piano responds to my touch better when I've got a box of gourmet chocolates (not just any cheap chocolate) sitting on top of it.

Of course, it could be that I also play better with chocolate in me.....
_________________________
"I don't play accurately - anyone can play accurately - but I play with wonderful expression. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life."

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#2287292 - 06/08/14 10:07 AM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
JimF Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 10/08/09
Posts: 2235
Loc: south florida
My piano won't stop making jokes about my playing.... and the Russian accent always cracks me up. grin
_________________________
Sonatine, No.2 Menuet - MRavel
Invention No.13 A-minor - JSBach
Consolation no.3- FLiszt



Estonia L190 #7284


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#2287429 - 06/08/14 05:30 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
malkin Online   content
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 04/18/09
Posts: 3878
Loc: *sigh* Salt Lake City
Russian accent?

Are you sure that it isn't a fiercely independent Finnic (that is to say non-IndoEuropean ) with a Germanic influenced accent?

My piano can say whatever it wants about my playing.
vabandust
ma ei räägi eesti keelt.
_________________________
Everything in moderation, including moderation. --Oscar Wilde

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#2287635 - 06/09/14 09:05 AM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
JimF Offline
2000 Post Club Member

Registered: 10/08/09
Posts: 2235
Loc: south florida
Yes, Malkin, I'm well-aware, since my better half is a native Finn...plus I once even sat on a piano bench with Indrek Laul while he played for me! But I have never been able to shake the long-ago experience of inadvertently (sort of) arriving at a remote border outpost on a Finnish dirt road in the middle of nowhere. Past the barber pole and guard towers was Estonia, but those guys with the automatic weapons sure looked Russian to me. smile
_________________________
Sonatine, No.2 Menuet - MRavel
Invention No.13 A-minor - JSBach
Consolation no.3- FLiszt



Estonia L190 #7284


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#2287730 - 06/09/14 03:20 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: earlofmar]
sinophilia Offline

Gold Supporter until Sept. 05 2014


Registered: 06/26/12
Posts: 1414
Loc: Italy
Originally Posted By: earlofmar


I believe Yamaha's have their souls removed at the factory


Oh now... I don't think so! grin

We'll see what Wally has to say when the technician comes to take out its inner parts for some maintenance later this summer... I'm pretty sure he'll sound much happier in September when he'll be back together, tuned and regulated!
_________________________
Diana & Wally - Yamaha W110BW
Martha Argerich... is an incarnation of the artistic metaphor of the "eternal feminine" that draws us upward. (Sergio Sablich)
http://soundcloud.com/sinophilia

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#2287751 - 06/09/14 04:02 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
Riddler Offline
500 Post Club Member

Registered: 05/13/05
Posts: 774
Loc: Florida
Yeah, I've talked about heart and soul with my Yamaha too. She's kinda flippant about it, really. She says the dividing line is clear - she's responsible for decibels, overtones, attack and decay envelopes, stuff like that, but not heart and soul, they are 100% in my area of responsibility.

I say - nah, other guys say their pianos have heart, have soul.

She says - phhhttt, have you ever looked inside me? Nothing but integrated circuits, wires, capacitors, stuff like that.

I say - phhttt yerself, have you looked in my heart recently? Nothing but metal stents, an electronic defibrillator and pacemaker with integrated circuits, lots of wires, capacitors, stuff like that.

She says - maybe that's yer problem.


This may work for Hiromi, but for me, it's going nowhere fast.

Ed
_________________________
http://edsjazzpianopage.blogspot.com/

My fingers are slow, but easily keep pace with my thoughts.


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#2287841 - 06/09/14 08:33 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
manyhands Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/19/12
Posts: 169
Loc: Md
My Big Mama patiently awaits my arrival and happily plays together as long as I care to tickle her. She makes me sound good, clearly a gal with soul and a big heart. My man says something is wrong with her when I'm gone...not a sound is heard.
_________________________
many hands many smiles

Big Mama Yama U1

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#2287909 - 06/10/14 12:37 AM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
Beth_Frances Offline
Full Member

Registered: 02/14/12
Posts: 247
Loc: Brisbane, Australia
My piano constantly complains of dirty teeth. All the germy nose-pickin' kids who drop by my house and run their bacteria-covered fingers all over her pearly whites... Poor old gal. I'll give her a good wipe over with disinfectant tonight and see if she cheers up.

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#2288244 - 06/10/14 08:19 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
manyhands Offline
Full Member

Registered: 03/19/12
Posts: 169
Loc: Md
Great grandchildren at my house know we wash our hands before piano playing. It was kind of funny watching child #1 tell child #2, "now we have to wash our hands before we play piano!"
_________________________
many hands many smiles

Big Mama Yama U1

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#2288712 - 06/11/14 10:36 PM Re: Piano Complaints [Re: Riddler]
Barry1963 Offline
Full Member

Registered: 08/25/13
Posts: 89
Loc: Nashville, Tennessee
My piano is a lush, only sounds good after a few drinks
_________________________
start date: August 25th 2013
currently Alfreds book #1
Hallet & Davis Co , spinet

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