Piano World Home Page Forums Our Most Popular Forums Adult Beginners Forum Recital 35 --- Call For Submissions

I'm not this round. It was my indecision that largely got me into this pickle.

I was only half way through learning the piece prior to departing for EPP2014, and thought I would likely sit this one out (or restore and play something else), since the half I had learned was still way off the mark. But, I came back re-energized.

The work has come a long way in the last couple of weeks. So, I've decided I will do my best to present it. I hope to get in, just prior to the deadline. I also have some new recording equipment I will need to figure out. But, practice is more important for the moment. It will be rough, but way further along, even now, then it would otherwise have been, were it not for this goal.

The count down is on for me now. A great roster developing of prepared folks I see. I look forward to joining you (barring any further setbacks) in time for another great show.

The use of a pseudonym is an age old practice. For me, my participation on ABF would be severely limited without it. Here's some thoughts on the reasons: http://www.writing-world.com/business/pseudonym.shtml

Obviously, for every good thing, there are undesirable side-effects. Some abuse the use of pseudonym in order to troll. It's the price we pay sometimes.

I think one thing that is important to me is to do my best to not offend or fan the flames of anything controversial. I imagine readers would not tolerate someone hiding behind a pseudonym lobbing controversies.

However, I would suggest that in today's digital age, my employer and indeed all sophisticated employers are capable of monitoring and mining every word being published by every employee. I personally believe what I do with piano is none of their business. However, that's not what many employers feel. Then there are the clients. How do they feel about my time spent on ABF instead of focusing on me, me, me, me, me. "So is that why it took you 3 days to come back with a proposal?" "No, that's not it at all. It's because...." "Well, you're fired!" This scenario is not too far from the possibilities with the prima Dona clients I work with. At my workplace, there is an expectation that I work all my waking hours. Even the perception of not doing so could have severe consequences. When it was discovered that I play the piano, the immediate questions from co-workers and managers were "when do you take lessons?" "How much do you practice?" Which my responses had to be, "Lessons on Saturday", which is true, and "I don't practice during weeknight", which is mostly true. You can see in their eyes the immediate judgment that you are not working hard enough. You dare have fun when everyone else is working so hard.

If I had to use my real name here, then I would have to manage my post the way one would manage posts by a Disney or Coca-Cola. I would not be able to write this post, for instance. I would have to come across in a very scripted manner, which is not the participation I would prefer on ABF. Real life is a very stressful place, and I would rather not have my real life crossing over into my hobby life. Having less stress was the whole point of piano to begin with. Having anonymity allows me to be more honest and be myself.

I also think it's wise to be anonymous, if you have the bad habit of spending your employers (tax payers in my case) paid time on piano forums

On the other hand I don't think it's too difficult to actually find out my identity with a little bit of detective work, at least on some other forums...and I really don't mind...I don't have a habit of writing anything I could not stand by or say to anyone in real life.

>Clearly I'm in the minority on this, but since we aren't fighting some rebel cause in fear for our lives (as far as I can tell within this little realm of piano players), why do so many of us feel the need to play someone else here while not doing the same in our so-called real lives? Is it because playing make-believe is not so easy for adults in the real world?

In this digital world everyone can collect a huge amount of personal information. Future employers, governments, identity thieves... Therefore for security and privacy reasons alone you basically have to anonymize yourself (and that alone may be insufficient)...

On the subject of not using one's real name... in addition to the comments about remaining anonymous from current or future employers, also I just think it's a safety thing. Anyone can read PW and a lot people more read than post. We don't know who's reading what we write. In the past, I've posted a lot of personal details that, along with a name, would make it very easy for someone to figure out where I lived, for example. Not that anyone necessarily would do that, but better safe than sorry. And because we're posting anonymously, it's easy to be candid.

But other than that, I personally try to ensure that internet interactions I have as "ShiroKuro" are basically the same as interactions I would have offline, under my real name. In other words, I try to always behave myself and not do or say/write something that I wouldn't do or say under my real name. So I'm not "playing someone else" -- I am as much myself here when I'm posting under the name ShiroKuro as I am when I'm talking to someone who knows my real name offline.

Agreed. I don't think there should be an assumption that we are pretending to be someone else just because of the anonymity. If anything as an adult beginner, it's easier to participate in the recitals anonymously. I would be too embarrassed to submit my recordings otherwise. There is no pretending at all. Yep, that's how I play... which is why I have a job outside of music.

Stalkers. Having had a family member stalked by a violent person, annonymity looks good. It's easy enough to find out who I am if you want to muck around PW. But I don't have to make it easier than it already is.

And for those who think PW is none of their employer's business. A big +1.

We live in enough of a fishbowl, thank you very much.

Cathy

It makes me sad that so many people feel a sense of fear here. That seems so incongruous in a forum for music lovers.

I am sorry if I touched a nerve folks. That was not my intention.

I was hoping to possibly develop friendships with a few real people who share a love for the piano. I think doing so might be difficult with pseudonyms, like trying to bond with people at a masked ball. Perhaps I am wrong. I am not really sure since I haven't done this before.

Oh well. Thank you for at least sharing your first name. That seems like enough to at least say "Hello Cathy. It is nice to meet you."

George, it's not that there's fear *here* it's that this is a public spot on the internet and many of us want to be careful. Also, I don't mean to accuse you of insensitivity, but I wonder if it might feel like less of an issue for you as a man -- for those who don't know, I'm female (and I've shared photos of myself here in the past)



I'd like to say you're wrong, but ultimately it depends on your own feelings about the issue. I've been posting here for almost 10 years (wow!) and I consider many here friends. And at the same time, given the fact that most of us don't live in the same area, sharing names just doesn't seem necessary. If we have the chance to meet, I'll be happy to share my name then, *offline* and in a situation where I'm sharing my name with someone who is also sharing their name with me. I think that's another part of it, if I share my name in this public thread, I'm sharing my name with a whole bunch of people who aren't, and of course with all the lurkers who aren't even posting. Even if you don't agree, I hope you can understand why many of us don't want to do that and try to keep that from preventing you from making friends here.

As I said, I've been ShiroKuro here for almost 10 years. Really, at this point, that isn't any less my name than the other name I use offline.

Believe me, I consider many of the people here friends. We communicate in pms, often after we've had a shared opinion of another poster's viewpoint, and some I have their non-PW e-mails and we've shared pictures, phone calls, commiserated over illnesses, celebrated over celebrations, etc.

Then there's the piano parties. I've been to several in Denver, and WiseBuff and her husband recently were in Santa Fe and we got together to play. But the most recent piano party you can read about in this thread:

European Piano Party in Lisbon

So stick around. You will indeed make friends.

Cathy

There is no fear here but just like any other public forum it is best to maintain one's security. The fact that we are music lovers only brings to mind the recent thread here on the Pianist Corner thread. After reading some of the snide remarks and vitriol I could see how some members would use another members personal information as a weapon in their shameful arguments.

A secondary reason for a certain amount of anonymity (we give away so much in our posts)is that as individuals we are able to express ourselves better when we feel we are not being judged by others. Our shields are actually our freedom and may actually help friendships evolve where ordinarily they may not. (I think you can tell I am a shameful optimist).

Surprising to me is how easy friendships can evolve in this internet world and after a while you will know who the "good guy" are. If you ever need a lesson in how the internet can be misused seek out the movie and/or TV show "Catfish" it's a bit of a revelation.

You mean like the fact that I can't spell anonymity?

<snort>

Cathy

thank goodness for spell checker is all I can say

George, in the early days of Facebook, people were so thrilled to have a way to keep in touch with their friends and casually let them know what was going on in their life when they didn't have time to see them or when they lived too far away for them to maintain the friendship any other way.

The trouble started however when their friending people became extended to those they had met on line. People who they shared interests with through their participation in discussion groups, like this, with those who, like you, they were convinced they shared a lot in common with, but whose character they didn't really know. Wearing masks is a two way street. Criminals and con artists can do it as easily as those with sincere and friendly intentions, and many cultivate and feign enthusiasm for people and interests (in some cases they might actually have the interest but they are using it) just for the purpose of getting personal information so they can rob or sexually harass the person, and that is what happen to many people on Facebook. People would announce they would be seeing a band or going on vacation, and they come home to find their house had been burglarized.

I'm not insinuating that you would do something like this, but there is always the chance, the same way there is the chance that you might be conned by any of us. You are new and have only made 20 posts and many of us have known each other for years and have exchanged many PM's over time. Most of the people I PM will sign their real first name after a few exchanges, but then expect us to continue to use the "mask" name in the public forum. But as Shirokuro says there is no reason to know more if you don't live nearby and haven't any reason to meet. Most friends don't include a surname when they address each other in real life.

George, for what it's worth I'll throw in my two cents. I've always used my real name here on the forum and my web site makes it pretty clear who I am and where I live. So far I have not regretted it. I feel pretty safe here as I stay away from personal attacks and any political talk. Those are the things that draw fire. That said, I was once on a forum where just those kinds of things did happen and I did regret that folks knew who I was. So I can understand people's trepidation. It does not happen here (this site is extremely well moderated) but anonymous people can get pretty nasty sometimes and sometimes what is said on the web...stays on the web.

Words to live by ....but I still wouldn't friend anyone on my Facebook who was new to me on a public forum after reading that they wanted to get to know me better. But as Shirokuro mentioned, gender might play a role in this, mine not theirs.

George, as said above, this is the internet.

Like anything on the web, this forum is like a public newspaper, the whole world can read everything ever posted here till end of times. There may be 100x more readers than posters here, or maybe 10000x including future readers. There is no way to be sure who's who here until you met others in person (or have other means to trace back internet connections such as hackers or governments). What is most touching to me is to see that you apparently do not realize that.

Again, be careful what you say in public. Today's normality may be a crime tomorrow.

Well, I don't have too much to add to George's comment except to support what the Others have said - yes, indeed it is possible to develop relationships with people even using pseudonyms. The more you participate here, the more learn about the community and you will find you "click" with certain folks.

I think it works because we're all very passionate about the same thing and our discussions are open and sincere. We often even leave ourselves vulnerable when we talk about what isn't going well. For the most part, and especially in this AB Forum, the community is supportive and very kind. Friendships on-line do develop..... and sometimes we even get to meet in person.

There are lots of piano parties in the USA, and we've started having European piano parties --- and then there are opportunities to meet up during travels, with folks you've connected with here.

But it does take time and one should always proceed with caution.

Quite the contrary for me. I don't have any need to be anonymous, but I still don't share personal information unless I feel it adds value to this forum.

We are here for music, and that is the part of ourselves we freely share, without constraint or reservation. The musical part of us remains unchanged whether we exist as a person in everyday life, or as an entity on the web. Music is life

Sharing personal details is a bit dangerous on the net (I know of quite some bad experiences and had one or two myself). So when I share personal info, I would do it using PM.