Piano World Home Page Forums Our Most Popular Forums Pianist Corner What would music be like if...

We've had a few threads like this pop up today, so I think it'd be best to condense them.

1)Chopin had lived to 70?
2)Mozart had been born in 1820?
3)Beethoven had died at the age of 30?
4) :t: Schoenberg had been kidnapped and eaten by a crazed caniballistic cult before he invented serialism? :t:
5)Bach had been hit Fabio style by a bird at the age of 5 and, instead of composing, spent the rest of his life trying to invent some sort of flying contraption to wreak revenge on the birds that disfigured him?
6)Andrew Lloyd Weber was born in 1590 and was considered the father of classical music?
7)The piano's place in music history as favorite instrument of many composers was replaced by the pan-flute?
8)Schubert and Mendelssohn had lived to the ripe old age of 227 through use of a 'sorcerer's stone' they had stolen from some dork with glasses and a wand?
9)Scriabin had been a stunning blonde woman with the same meglomaniacal and compositional tendencies?
10)Mr. Peabody had gone back in time and given Bach an electric guitar and amp?
11)Sauron had killed Frodo and obtained the Ring of power?
12)Schumann's insanity manifested itself in an obsession with flamenco guitar instead of suicidal tendencies?
13)The maker of the first piano had decided he wanted the high keys on the left side?
14)Liszt had been born with 7 fingers on each hand?
15)Any key played on piano instead of hitting 3 strings, hit a cat or dog(depending on your preference) tuned to meow or bark the appropiate pitch?

Bonus points if you can answer the question for all of the above.

1) Chopin would acheived absolute perfection, if indeed there was doubt that he hadn't already with Op. 60 and 61.
2) Mozart would become a legend in whatever time he was born and regardless of what career he chose.
3) Beethoven would likely have amounted to about as much as Hummel did. I think Beethoven's surroundings and inner turmoil played a HUGE role in his music.

4-7) lol

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Herr_Gnome:

5)Bach had been hit Fabio style by a bird at the age of 5 and, instead of composing, spent the rest of his life trying to invent some sort of flying contraption to wreak revenge on the birds that disfigured him?

That's funny but weird. How do you come up with this stuff???!!

15)Any key played on piano instead of hitting 3 strings, hit a cat or dog(depending on your preference) tuned to meow or bark the appropiate pitch?

That reminds me of those commercials (I think maybe they were about cat food or something) with that annoying cat meow song. Do you guys know what I'm talking about?

[QUOTE]Originally posted by iamcanadian:

3) Beethoven would likely have amounted to about as much as Hummel did. I think Beethoven's surroundings and inner turmoil played a HUGE role in his music.

It doesn't matter though since he's the greatest composer of all time.

1) He would've written very similar music the rest of his life, following in the niche he created. Part of the "genius" of Chopin was in dying young... (like so many other geniuses).

2) We'd have a better idea what his skull looked like after his death. Ah, and he probably would've had an easier time yelling at Liszt for playing his music too fast.

3) For shame!
4) If only... *sighs* "Tis a consummation devoutly to be wish'd" :p
5) See also, "Icarus"
6) See also, "Phantom of the Fugue"
7) It would solidify a certain Greek god's place in history (for those who don't actively read Ovid, that is)
8) As long as, with their last breath, they both say "scar" simultaneously... :p
9) I probably would've dated her...but then, I would've had to be born a lot earlier. No sense dating the memory of a stunning blonde....
10) Bach and Roll? Dunno...sounds corny to me. :p
11) I think Gandalf woulda' been a little ****ed, considering before Sauron got the ring, Gandalf was the most powerful of the Maiar. And I'm pretty sure Sauron would've dated Arwen...if he could get past her looking like Steven Tyler. :p
12) "Smooth", I think...
13) Throughout history, thousands of people are heard muttering, "Son of a b*tch..." :p
14) What, you mean instead of the normal six?
15) We'd get an animalistic interpretation of Mel Brooks' interpretation of cave men singing the "Hallelujah Chorus"....

1)We've got lots of more great music.
2)We've got more romantic music than classical music .
3)We wouldn't be able to become pianists.
4)We wouldn't have serialism.
5)There wouldn't be any pianists.
6)AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
7)We wouldn't have pianists.
8)They would've composed modern songs
9)We've got the same music
10)Bach would've killed him
11)Meh...
12)He would've lived longer but not writing more piano music.
13)Everything was just reverse.
14)He would've composed impossible to play music.
15)The piano wouldn't exist anymore due to Greenpeace and other animal fighters

I do agree

I hope Spring comes soon for you guys. Sounds like you're all suffering from severe cases of cabin fever. But, don't worry; this, too, will pass.

Taking into consideration the random chaotic happenings of the universe, and knowing that everything that is the way it is now is a direct result of everything leading up to now, not only would music be different, but ALL of history would be different. even the slightest occurance has a profound effect on the workings of the future. You have listed some big changes in history, and if any one of them occured, who knows, we could all be dead already.

These threads always get me excited because they make me think of how each tiny individual leaves his mark and effects the history of a gigantic universe. history is literaly shaped by each and every one of us. Not only history here on earth, but the history of the entire cosmos. Me making this post has changed the course of everything that will ever happen. Amazing.

I remember an unansweable thinking puzzle posed by a professor I had in a random discussion in a physics class.

"If I had gotten on that plane I would have been killed because it crashed."

"But how do you know if you had gotten on the plane it would have crashed?"

I'm a nerd I know, but these are the things I often think about. Sorry about a yappy, way off base post . I just drank a couple cups of strong coffee.

wtf.


4) Someone else would have done that. It was inevitable IMO, as now is inevitable to have some tonal tendences in contemporary music

Was that in some movie? which one?

1 Chopin might have invented jazz
2 Mozart would've studied with Chopin
3 He'd have missed a lot of suffering and we'd have missed a lot of music

5 We'd have never heard of the Wright brothers
6 We don't want to think about it

10 We'd heard some really great hard rock

12 Clara would've performed with a rose clenched between her teeth
13 We'd have have been forced into ambigdexerity

14 He WASN'T???

15 It's been done - The Siamese are considered the Steinways of the cat piano world

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Herr_Gnome:

14)Liszt had been born with 7 fingers on each hand?

Well, since he was born with 44 fingers on each hand, I'm guessing he just wouldn't have been as good.

If Chopin had lived to the age of 70, he'd be one really crabby old guy!

(That's Mr. C., speaking French)

True, especially if he'd had to teach Amadeus.

Well, you may not know this, but I own a what-if machine(like the one in Futurama) and I ran these scenarios through it. So this is what really would happen...

1)He'd push the rhythmic and harmonic boundaries of his music much further.
2)Instead of focusing on creating Romantic music, he'd work on creating a series of works that improve your intelligence when listened to.
3)All Encyclopedias would have to recall all their current editions and change the death-dates in the Beethoven entries. This would bankrupt the Encyclopedia industry.
4)The Schoenberg cells ingested by the cannibals would take over their brains, creating a super-race of serialist-zombies. These zombies would roam the land attacking anyone opposed to modernism. (BTW this would make a great horror movie if any big-shot Hollywood producers are reading.)
5)Bach's incredible work ethic would lead to the extinction of all known birds with the exception of flightless birds. The phrase 'dead as a dodo' would become obsolete.
6)The machine showed a grim post-apocalyptic nightmare for this. I'll spare you any description beyond that as it's too gruesome to recount.
7)The Godowsky-Chopin triple etude would be really, really, really, damn hard. :rolleyes:
8)Schubert would totally sell out in the '80's releasing terrible synth pop. Schubert's 5 concertos for sax and orchestra with soloist Kenny G would top charts for years. Mendelssohn on a bet with a friend would see how many Songs Without Words he could write. The Complete Works of Mendellsohn for Piano would end up taking 50 volumes.
9)That Scriabin CD you own... The one with the picture of Horowitz... it wouldn't have a picture of Horowitz anymore...
10)Instead of becoming a shred guitarist, Yngwie Malmsteen would compose two sets of preludes and fugues through all keys for the harpsichord.
11)Sauron would side with Brahms in the modernist/anti-modernist debate. Classical music would not evolve past Wagner.
12)As you may or may not know, the 2nd mvt of the German Requiem was based off of a funeral march that Brahms wrote after Schumann's suicide attempt. This movement would be replaced by a 15 minute virtuoso guitar solo that would do some damage to the structural and thematic unity of the German Requiem.
13)There'd be countless posts asking 'How can I get my RH up to speed with my LH'
14)At first you might think that this would make Liszt an even better pianist, but you fail to take into account the webbing between Liszt's seven fingers. This would make him a terrible pianist; however, he'd be the first man to swim the English Channel.
15)The price of cat-pianos would be much higher due to the relative low numbers of 'bass cats.' Baroque purists would insist that Bach be played on Dog-piano(or at least on a Les Paul) as the cat-piano wasn't invented till Beethoven's time. Finally, you'd spend much more time cleaning up after your piano than you currently do.

Unforutnately, when I tried to run all of these scenarios together, I got the blue screen of death. So thanks to Windows, we'll never know.

*laughs* Yeah... Mel Brooks' "History of the World: Part I", the "invention of music"