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Page 118 of 161 < 1 2 ... 116 117 118 119 120 ... 160 161 >
Topic Options
#1867752 - 03/24/12 01:58 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

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#1868056 - 03/25/12 04:33 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Jerry Groot RPT]
Horowitzian Offline
8000 Post Club Member

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 8453
Originally Posted By: Jerry Groot RPT


"Accidentally"? grin


http://www.dropline.net/cats/kitty/has-the-happy-pillz


Edited by Horowitzian (03/25/12 04:33 AM)
_________________________
Close only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades, and nuclear weapons.

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#1868174 - 03/25/12 11:31 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1868506 - 03/25/12 11:49 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Daryl Durand Offline
Full Member

Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 419
Loc: Missouri USA


_________________________
Daryl Durand, RPT
Durand Piano Service
http://www.durandpiano.com

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#1868766 - 03/26/12 01:31 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan



Subject: Hospital chart bloopers
Supposed actual items posted on hospital charts....


1. The patient refused autopsy.

2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

12. She is numb from her toes down.

13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated
and sent home.

14. The skin was moist and dry.

15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

21. Examinatio n of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.

24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1868772 - 03/26/12 01:38 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Jerry Groot RPT]
piano joy Offline
500 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/28/11
Posts: 807
Loc: Florida


Jerry, that is HILARIOUS! I've read similar at work and here's one I regularly come across:

in otherwise good health, except for the Stage IV Metastatic lung cancer..

and....

Patient states not much appetite.
(later, in the chart):
dinner usually chicken, vegetables, bread, 2 pieces of chocolate cake for dessert.
_________________________
I don't care too much for money. For money can't buy me love.
-the Beatles




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#1868843 - 03/26/12 04:02 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
Thanks Piano Joy! We all appreciate that!! smile

_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1868918 - 03/26/12 07:03 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1869179 - 03/27/12 10:25 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Daryl Durand Offline
Full Member

Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 419
Loc: Missouri USA


_________________________
Daryl Durand, RPT
Durand Piano Service
http://www.durandpiano.com

Top
#1869540 - 03/28/12 12:22 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Diane... Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/16/06
Posts: 3450
Loc: Western Canada
It's melting here! but ... not melting like you think! grin
(This is still my all time FAVOURITE picture)



I had never heard of a floating "ice cream" truck, but here it is!



Edited by Diane... (03/28/12 12:25 AM)
_________________________
http://www.pianoworld.com/Uploads/files/goldsparkledress.jpg
Diane
Jazz/Blues/Rock/Boogie Piano Teacher


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#1869641 - 03/28/12 06:51 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1870010 - 03/28/12 09:41 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Daryl Durand Offline
Full Member

Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 419
Loc: Missouri USA
Has anyone seen the dog today?



_________________________
Daryl Durand, RPT
Durand Piano Service
http://www.durandpiano.com

Top
#1870028 - 03/28/12 10:09 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
Who let the dogs out?

_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1870049 - 03/28/12 10:59 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Jerry Groot RPT]
Cinnamonbear Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 01/09/10
Posts: 3973
Loc: Rockford, IL
My contribution to the thread:



--Andy
_________________________
I may not be fast,
but at least I'm slow.

Top
#1870606 - 03/29/12 06:31 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs
And make love,' and you answer,
'Pick one; I can't do both!'

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your friends compliment you
On your new alligator shoes
And you're barefoot..

'OLD' IS WHEN...
A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy
And your pacemaker opens the garage door.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going braless
Pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You don't care where your spouse goes,
Just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
'Getting a little action'
Means you don't need to take any fiber today.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
'Getting lucky' means you find your car
In the parking lot.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
An 'all nighter' means not getting up
To use the bathroom.
AND

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are not sure these are jokes
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1870731 - 03/29/12 10:49 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Daryl Durand Offline
Full Member

Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 419
Loc: Missouri USA
Really good OLD jokes Jerry

_________________________
Daryl Durand, RPT
Durand Piano Service
http://www.durandpiano.com

Top
#1871349 - 03/31/12 07:52 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Daryl Durand]
piano joy Offline
500 Post Club Member

Registered: 03/28/11
Posts: 807
Loc: Florida
Ladies,
How true is this?
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not a permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. That will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying "Go to heck."
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.

ยท Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.
_________________________
I don't care too much for money. For money can't buy me love.
-the Beatles




Top
#1871356 - 03/31/12 08:20 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Rostosky Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 04/30/11
Posts: 3339
Loc: Lost in cyberspace.in the UK.
Excellent pianojoy, may I add one? "It doesnt matter" In reality ( inside the ladies brain) It does matter, in fact it matters so much that nothing else that may have been previously bothering her matters anymore, except of course for this very serious new case of "mattering" which will be directed at you, for a long time.
_________________________


Rise like lions after slumber,in unvanquishable number. Shake your chains to earth like dew
which in sleep has fallen on you. Ye are many,they are few. Shelley

Founder and creator ofRostoskys 13th crystal skull project

Top
#1871753 - 04/01/12 12:56 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
Good ones! Thanks!!!
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1871754 - 04/01/12 12:56 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
Here's my new house.

_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1872037 - 04/01/12 04:03 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Diane... Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/16/06
Posts: 3450
Loc: Western Canada
You might need some "stairs" for that house Jerry! grin








Edited by Diane... (04/01/12 04:10 PM)
_________________________
http://www.pianoworld.com/Uploads/files/goldsparkledress.jpg
Diane
Jazz/Blues/Rock/Boogie Piano Teacher


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#1872059 - 04/01/12 04:45 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan


_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1872770 - 04/02/12 07:36 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan

Two Welsh Girls in a Pub....



I was in a pub on Saturday night. Had a few....
I noticed two large women by the bar.
They both had strong accents so I asked, "Hey, are
you two ladies from Scotland?"
One of them chirped: "It's WALES you friggin' idiot!"
So, I immediately apologized and said..., "Sorry, are
you two whales from Scotland ?"
Then the lights went out....
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1873009 - 04/03/12 10:06 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Daryl Durand Offline
Full Member

Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 419
Loc: Missouri USA
It's time to mow the grass

_________________________
Daryl Durand, RPT
Durand Piano Service
http://www.durandpiano.com

Top
#1873180 - 04/03/12 04:09 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan
Hahaha
_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1873325 - 04/03/12 09:03 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Jerry Groot RPT Offline
6000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/07/07
Posts: 6828
Loc: Grand Rapids Michigan


This is what I need to do to my covers!!

_________________________
Jerry Groot RPT
Piano Technicians Guild
Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.grootpiano.com

We love to play BF2.

Top
#1873493 - 04/04/12 06:03 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Daryl Durand Offline
Full Member

Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 419
Loc: Missouri USA
_________________________
Daryl Durand, RPT
Durand Piano Service
http://www.durandpiano.com

Top
#1873524 - 04/04/12 08:17 AM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Jerry Groot RPT]
Les Koltvedt Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 04/13/05
Posts: 3195
Loc: Canton, MI
sorry


Edited by Les Koltvedt (04/04/12 08:17 AM)
_________________________
Les Koltvedt
LK Piano
Servicing the S. Eastern Michigan Area
PTG Associate

Top
#1873850 - 04/04/12 08:28 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Daryl Durand]
Diane... Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/16/06
Posts: 3450
Loc: Western Canada
Originally Posted By: Daryl Durand


hahahahahahahahahahahaha
_________________________
http://www.pianoworld.com/Uploads/files/goldsparkledress.jpg
Diane
Jazz/Blues/Rock/Boogie Piano Teacher


Top
#1873853 - 04/04/12 08:30 PM Re: OT Paging Jerry Groot (and any one else living in the Northland) [Re: Horowitzian]
Diane... Offline
3000 Post Club Member

Registered: 11/16/06
Posts: 3450
Loc: Western Canada
I'm "guessing" the dog DRIVES! wink

_________________________
http://www.pianoworld.com/Uploads/files/goldsparkledress.jpg
Diane
Jazz/Blues/Rock/Boogie Piano Teacher


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