kids have ever said to you or about you in mixed company?

Heap many moons ago, my daughter said to SWMBO in a crowded room: "Mom, how come you don't buy those sweaters with the lumps in them like all those other women do?"

Top that!

Jamie

here's one..

In front of a famous actress/model who had just complimented my daughter and suggested that she do some modeling:

"Oh, no thank you. My parents told me that all of those women have to have plastic surgery to look that way and it isn't natural beauty."

Geez....

Jamie

I don't think anyone can atop yours.

SWMBO and I took Ten - she was Four at the time -to Cedar Point, an amusement park north of us on Lake Erie. We stayed at The Breakers, a historic old Resort-type hotel that's part of the park. We were just coming in from the pool, with "Four" walking along between us, headed in to the hotel. There were a few picnic tables and benches on the patio just outside the doors that we were walking toward, and a few people were sitting at the tables.

As we walked, SWMBO & I were discussing where we were going to eat, what we were going to do later that day, etc. Four was chattering on and on, as four year olds will do, and we weren't really paying attention to what she was saying. As I was talking, I did notice that two teenaged boys sitting at the picnic table we were approaching were laughing hysterically. Gradually, it started to sink into my consciousness what Four was saying, over and over, and pointing at a middle-aged gentleman in swimwear, sitting at one of the adjacent tables:

"Mommy, Daddy, look at that man, he's REALLY FAT!!! I've never seen anyone THAT FAT before! Look at that FAT MAN, he's so fat he has BOOBIES!!!"

SWMBO & I looked over at the man, who had turned beet red and was burning holes in us with his eyes. We were absolutely mortified, and the two teenagers just sat there in tears, laughing. We literally dragged Four into the hotel lobby as quickly as we could, and as soon as we were out of visibilty and earshot we both literally fell to the floor laughing.

Ahh, kids.

Dwain, I am (far) too young for kids myself, but your story reminds me of going to the pool with my father and little sister when I was about five she was just starting to talk (single words and simple phrases). All of a sudden, my sister pointed straight at a slightly large girl and said at the top of her voice (and enhanced by the pool's natural reverberation) "FAT LADY!"

my sister still shudders when reminded of that story.

Not embarrassing but it always amuses me:

My little sister had caught the first 20 mins or so of Jaws (many years ago). My mother put her to bed but she was very scared. My mother noticed that my sister was curled up in bed. "Put your legs down" my mother says. "No, I'm scared" says my sister. My mother tries to reassure her "But Teddy isn't scared" referring to my sister's favourite toy lying in bed with her. "Yes but Teddy's legs aren't as long as mine!" she replies

My husband used to have a habit of leaving the bathroom door open. One day, I walked past the hallway and my youngest daughter (then about 3 or so) was standing outside the bathroom door giggling. I hadn't noticed that the bathroom door was open. When I asked her what was so funny she said, "Daddy's peeing with his panties on!" We all laughed histerically and my husband still gets embarrassed till this day when mentioned. After that, he always remembered to close the door.

Lyn B.

My sister (9), younger brother (7) and I (11) visited my grandparents for a month or so during the summers. One morning at breakfast we were recounting the previous days adventures and 7 said "I fell down so hard that I bruised Both[/b] seats." Sister 9 immediately corrected him by pointing out that "seat" was singular. (She's a teacher now.) Defending his choice of words, 7 insisted "No, its seatSSS[/b] . There's One, then there's that big crack, and then there's the Other." Grandma, a pretty straight-laced woman who, as a minister's wife, normally frowned on anatomical discussion just burst out laughing and couldn't stop. Grandpa's hearty laugh ended with a chuckled blessing of 7's interpretation "Well, he's right[/b] , you know." Eating resumed.
Bob

Not really embarrassing, just funny. Our son, aged four, at an agricultural show during a silence in front of a hundred or so people.

"Dad, that bull has a very big ballocks."

Also not embarrassing, but funny:

At age five, my twin nephews were going to their first basketball camp, after living a fairly sheltered life to that point. My sister dropped them off somewhat nervously, then returned at the end of the day to pick them up in front of the gym. Of course, she wanted to know how their day had gone. "Oh mom, it was great, and coach is really good. He even has basketball hair!!" My sister, of course, asked what exactly basketball hair was. "Oh you know, basketball hair!," was the reply, with some impatience.

My sister let it drop, but was curious. The next afternoon when she picked up my nephews, she decided to park and meet this fabulous coach with "basketball hair." Turns out the coach was Black, and the first Black man my nephews had ever met in person. Hence: basketball hair = black nappy hair!

Also, our son was born when my daughter was almost four. On his first day home, when it came time to change his diaper for the first time, my daughter of course wanted to help. When the diaper came off, her eyes widened and she said, "Oh Mommy, what's that sticky-outie thing??" I had to spend a bit of time convincing her that this was perfectly normal, that all boys had them. She was totally appalled. I remember thinking that Freud was completely wrong when he talked about "sticky-outie thing" envy!

Nina

I was in the grocery store with my four kids (yikes) and after a hard day at work I admit that I wasnt relaly tuned into what they were doing

I noticed that other shoppers were looking at me a smiling/laughing although it didnt click right away, and when I looked over to my then 3 year old I saw that she was standing right in front of a nun (wearing the habit etc) and pointing right up at her and crying "witch, witch".

I rushed over and apologised but she wasnt amused

It was the first time Maddy had seen a nun and the long black habit freaked her out.