Hi, P*D here!
I hope this thread doesn't move in the direction of parent-bash / parent-defense. I don't think that's the point here.
This behavior is extreme and dad sounds more than a touch insecure in front of you. This might all go away with a bit of gentle humor on your part.
Yes this could be the case. I appreciate all replies here. The fact that you say this dad's behavior is "extreme" is especially helpful, as you were very involved and supportive in your son's musical learning experiences, and have shared much with us here. And you are right that I don't want to turn this into a parent bashing or defensive debate. I am coming from the standpoint of appreciating this dad for his involvement, and want to stay positive. We teachers need supportive parents!
But this dad is over the top and I need to nip this in the bud.
In addition, both parents are a bit insecure right now I think because I am a brand new teacher for their kids.
Yes, I think this is extreme.
I will admit that on occasion I would "approach the bench," so to speak, to ask the teacher something or note something that I had observed at home, but constant interruption is completely counterproductive.
Does the kid basically look at dad throughout the lesson, waiting either for approval or rebuke? If so, you need to press the reset button! Gently, of course.
You do want a supportive parent, and a knowledgable one can be your best ally. But during lesson time there can be only one master. And even at home, the kid has to be able to take a breath or two without constant correction and nagging. A parent should be able to be in the room without distracting the student. Just read a newspaper or magazine! You'll still be able to follow along when needed.
For the first couple of years, I was the teacher's proverbial right hand, yet I too was "banished" from the room for a short while (a month or so, if I recall). I went, and did so without complaint. I understood that the teacher needed some complete and undivided attention. Later, I was deliberately brought back into the lesson and shown exactly what the teacher was trying to accomplish. It goes both ways. She knew I was her teaching assistant at home ... whether she liked it or not.
So she used that situation to her (and to my son's) advantage. Could things have gone better if I had become a potted plant? Who knows. Idle speculation.