Hi Pianoworld composers!
This is my first composition. This piano trio was inspired by a prayer that I pray every night.
"Angel of God, my guardian dear, through whom God's love, commits me here, forever this day, be at my side, to light, to guard, to rule, and to guide. Amen"
This is the first of 5 possible movements. The first being the prayer and the other 4 representing 2. to light 3. to guard 4. to rule 5. to guide. I have composed 3/5 so far.
This first movement "The Prayer" was recorded by some high-school students and my piano teacher at a summer camp I attended. I'd just like to know how I did on my first composition. Appreciate it! Harrison Sheckler
Prayer to My Guardian Angel
Has anyone been able to view this? Or can only SoundCloud users see this?
Anyone know something I can load the recording to for free so everyone can hear it?
Ok. Listened to it. Overall, not bad, certainly not my cup of tea but I do think there is an audience for this kind of music. Some suggestions:
Is that a cello? Whatever the low stringed instrument is--there are some odd notes played there, sounds out of key. It sounded in general like the cellist was not up to par with the other two instrumentalists. That being said, if there were mistakes in there, or something, a more talented cellist might make for a better rendition of this piece. If I am incorrect and the notes were played correctly, the dissonances were intentional, maybe consider them... I really like dissonance, generally speaking, but the dissonances in this piece in the cello part are very out if place on context of the rest of the music.
Now, this was apparently a live recording so as far as mic placement is concerned, mixing, etc, perhaps you had nothing to do with it, but I really thought the strings overpowered the piano too much. Realistically in a live setting you would not get such a large gap in dynamics between the two instruments. I think if the piano was a bit louder it might "wash out" some of the string parts creating a cool effect.
Your melodies are nice and consonant but the rhythms do not make a lot of sense to me. I think less melodic motion (longer notes) and more discrete breaks would sound nicer, give this piece a more lyrical, floaty quality. With the complex melodic movement it is difficult to decipher the interplay between the voices, especially in the last part where both string players and pianist are playing.
Anyways, while I do offer a lot of criticisms, I think this piece is well done, especially for a first composition. Harmonically I think this works quite well, I think the weak point is in how the rhythms work against one another.
Thank you for your comments!
Yes, the cellist was out of tune and he wasn't exactly together towards the end. :/Hopefully I can get a better recording soon.
For a first try this is great! Very pretty. Too bad about the cello, but I've heard far worse. I would characterize this piece as ear candy in that it's very sweet. Like your prayer it's short (and sweet). My personal taste runs toward greater contrast and a touch more harmonic adventure (maybe more than a touch). Nice job for a first piece, keep trying.
Hi, hsheck! Well, my general reaction is that you must like Brahms -- it has a late Brahmsian quality: deceptively simple, intimate, tender, informed predominantly by string phrasing and gestures. Personally, I wasn't bothered by the cello -- both had rich tone, and served the character of the music very well, I thought. A nice first effort -- to be sure, a "small" composition, but nicely proportioned, and successful on its own terms.
Thank you Mr. Chandler! I'm almost done composing all 5 movements of the piece so I'll be sure to post them soon for more input!
Hi Mr. Adrianson!
Thank you so much for your thoughtful comments!
That is interesting that you mentioned the piece reminds you of Brahms because my piano teacher, composition teacher at camp, and others have mentioned that too! I hadn't listened to a lot of pieces by him prior to this composition, but since I've received these comments I've listened to more of his works. I can see the connection too! Very interesting. Maybe someday people will be comparing their pieces to my own! Hahaha